Russia Brings Corruption to Social Networks

MOSCOW — Russia is launching a new social network that is bound to modernize country’s corruption culture once and for all. Under direct supervision of Prime Minister Putin and FSS (Federal Security Service) the concept of easy, user-friendly bribing via Internet was brought to life. BribeBook allows various high and low rank state officials to create profiles, describing their field of corruption, rates and bribe portfolio. PayPal makes bribe transactions safe and fast and keeps clients and service providers very happy.

Ivan Samoylov, a middle class Math teacher from Russia told us his success story on BribeBook: “There has always been these awkward moments when a parent would come and ask not to fail his rather unintelligent offspring. Then I’d have to make hints, blink, make gestures symbolizing money for them to understand how to tackle the issue. In fact by the end of each semester I blinked so much I had to go see an eye doctor.” Once BribeBook was launched Samoylov registered and distributed his profile URL at the parent — teacher committee. Parents jumped at the idea immediately: “Let’s face it my son is never gonna be the next Einstein or Putin” says Olga Mironova, 35 single mother, “I knew he had problems with math, history, literature, basically with every other subject. I logged in and saw that Mr Samoylov hasl listed his bribe price list. $200 for a C, $ 400 for a B and $800 an A. I decided not to be fancy and go with a B”.  BribeBook currently allows many tools for business expansion. The math teacher can join Russian literature teacher and offer discounts for combined bribes.

“I always follow the special offers on BribeBook. How great it is to get rid of a tax duties, have your liver surgery and get a free ballet ticket with just one click.” boasts one of the creators of BribeBook. Every day more and more Russians think of a way they can get involved in corruption. For people who don’t work in government agencies, do not provide ant services it is quite tricky to find ways to ask for bribes. Sasha Levin, 34, unemployed, turned out to be rather witty. “I organized a rock band and we started rehearsing at my flat. However on my BribeBook profile you can pay me not to rehearse. It’s only $24.99”  While visit statistics pierce the sky, rumors say even President Medvedev has a secret profile, where one can pay to get uranium enrichment and WMD development tips, as well as better oil and gas deals. True or not, one thing is certain, corruption in Russia will never be the same again.[ad#Google Adsense Horizontal]